Parents find great joy in watching their grandchildren open gifts on special occasions like their birthday or Christmas, but there comes a point when gifts no longer seem suitable.
Some grandparents may agree to stop giving money to their grandchildren once they graduate high school or college, or reach a certain age such as 21-25. Others may stop gifting altogether.
Adulthood
Being a grandparent can be immensely satisfying, and nothing beats watching your grandchildren open their gifts on their birthday and experience their delight in using or playing with their new toy or gift. But as your grandchildren reach adulthood it can become harder and harder to determine how much is too much.
Many grandparents decide to stop giving gifts to their grandchildren when they reach specific ages, such as college or high school graduation, though it ultimately depends on each family and its decision making process.
No matter the gift-giving situation, grandparents should abide by certain key rules when giving to their grandchildren. First and foremost, it’s essential that grandparents remember not to condition their generosity with conditions such as budget constraints or conflict between themselves and the other parent(s).
Some grandparents choose to stop giving gifts at a certain age; others continue giving as long as they want, sometimes covering educational and medical expenses for their grandchildren. It is always wise for grandparents to make sure that any financial gifts made to their grandchildren are legal and with their child’s permission before doing so.
At the core of good gift-giving etiquette is thanking your grandchildren for any gifts that they receive from grandparents, such as phone calls or emails from grandchildren who complain that no thank-you note was ever written to acknowledge these gestures of affection from their relatives. Not doing so sends a clear signal that these grandchildren do not care to honor or thank their grandparent(s).
If this occurs with your grandchildren, their parents are likely responsible for this misstep in etiquette. If there are issues in the family dynamic between you and one or both parents of the grandchildren in question, it may be best to forgoing gifts altogether.
Teenage Years
Giving gifts to grandchildren is one of the greatest joys of being a grandparent, and watching their reaction when opening something you selected especially for them can be very fulfilling. But as their kids age and become less interested in receiving presents may feel too old for you. To counter this feeling it’s important to remember that gifts are simply one form of expression of affection between grandparents and grandchildren and it may not necessarily be their fault that their loved one no longer receives presents as they age.
Once their grandchildren reach adulthood, grandparents generally stop giving gifts as it is assumed that adults can take care of themselves without needing grandparent assistance. However, some grandparents may continue giving them gifts if there is a close bond between the generations.
One of the primary reasons that grandparents stop giving gifts to their grandchildren is that they feel as if their grandchildren take advantage of them and their money; often this occurs during teenage years when young people take advantage of their grandparents. They may fail to send thank-you notes as promised; making grandparents feel unappreciated and unwanted.
Financial difficulties may lead some grandparents to forgoing giving gifts to their grandchildren, making it harder for them to afford this tradition as their grandchildren grow older and become less affordable for gifts. It’s important to remember that gifts are simply another way of showing your affection – you have other avenues available to express this sentiment!
If you are concerned that your grandchildren won’t use their gifts wisely, consider other ways for them to show their thanks – for instance writing them thank-you notes or calling to say so; saving their money until it can be used towards something they really want could also work well.
Younger Children
Remember when grandchildren become adults that it may no longer be necessary or appropriate for grandparents to buy gifts for them. Some grandparents stop giving their grandchildren gifts when they reach specific ages such as adulthood or college age, while others may continue giving at any point – it all depends on family relationships and preferences.
Rather than stew over her excessive gift giving to your son, try talking it through with her and explaining that while you appreciate her affection and want her gifts in your home, the constant stream is beginning to make your home chaotic and stressful. Perhaps she may agree it is an issue and offer to limit or switch up how they show their affection instead.
Spending time with your granddaughters is another excellent way of showing your care without overindulging them. From visiting them at their house to taking them out for lunch or inviting them over for dinner, spending quality time together can go a long way towards showing how much you care and creating positive relationships between generations. This approach may especially prove useful with younger grandchildren who depend on you more than adults do for companionship and attention.
Some grandparents opt to give cash instead of gifts when celebrating holidays and special events with their grandchildren, allowing them to buy whatever they please without needing to keep track of where their money goes. Unfortunately, this approach could prove costly should some grandchildren not act responsibly with their spending.
Overall, it is up to grandparents and their families to determine when it’s appropriate for them to stop giving gifts to their grandchildren. It could depend on several factors including finances, age and maturity of grandchildren as well as quality of relationship between two parties. It is also wise to respect any wishes from grandchild’s parents; otherwise grandchildren may feel unappreciated and resentful that their gifts weren’t given just like everyone else’s.
Older Children
Grandparents cherish seeing their grandchildren, and enjoy showering them with gifts and treats. This gives them an opportunity to spend quality time with their grandchildren while creating an extra-special bond that transcends that they share with their own children; such an emotional tie often makes gift giving difficult to stop altogether.
How grandparents decide whether or not to gift to their grandchildren is entirely up to them. Some may feel as if they can no longer afford gifts after a certain age; others may have strong relationships with their grandchild(ren), and would like to keep giving for as long as they can afford.
Before making their decision, grandparents should carefully evaluate both their financial circumstances and relationship with their grandchildren before making a choice. Some families agree to stop giving money after certain ages such as 21, 25 or marriage of the grandchildren in question.
Some grandparents may opt to stop giving gifts to their grandchildren if there is tension between themselves and the parent of the child in question, however it should always be remembered that their relationship with their grandchild should remain distinct and treated accordingly.
As grandchildren get older they tend to spend less time with their grandparents, and this could cause the relationship between them and them to weaken over time. In such an instance, it would be prudent for grandparents to reduce the amount of gifts they buy for their grandchildren as this will help preserve a close bond and strengthen it over time.
Grandchildren often change as they develop, making it essential for grandparents to stay in contact with them to keep tabs on what’s happening in their lives and have an idea of the appropriate gifts to purchase for them.
If grandparents find themselves purchasing too many gifts for their grandchildren, this could lead to tension within the family and lead to resentment and tension within. If this has become an issue for your grandchild(ren), discuss it before the next birthday or holiday celebration to avoid any misunderstandings and stop any conflicts from becoming too serious.